Scars are wisdom in disguise.

Passion sometimes turned out to be obsession!!

Some say the world will end in fire, Some say in ice. From what I've tasted of desire I hold with those who favor fire. But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate To say that for destruction ice Is also great And would suffice.

Rejected from my first SSB. Was mentally wounded, but character is pillar of success, and that was the time to show real character. I applied for 6 SSC flying pilot course. Flying pilot is the best course in Indian Air Force. I have seen pilots from young age, and always felt to be one of them, and finally I was getting chance to be a pilot.

I was shortlisted and got my SSB call. My SSB interview was scheduled for 16th December 2009, and I had to once again report to Mysore, the place where I got rejection last time. But due to Telagana riots, I requested to change my SSB date, and they alloted me 2nd of January 2010. This SSB was going to be my first SSB of the new year 2010. I was prepared for psychology, group task and interview. I was sure that I will easily clear Pilot Aptitude Battery Test i.e. PABT. 

I celebrated my new year in train, and had a thought in my mind, that may be this year I am going to travel allot, as on the first day of the new year, I was travelling. I reached Mysore, a day in advance, stayed in a hotel for night. But I was awake till 3 in morning due to one of my friend, as we kept on talking whole night. 

Early in morning, without sufficient sleep, I once again reported to Mysore railway station, from where we were taken to selection center. I was tired, but I was focused in morning. After document check, they briefed us about the test. On the first day of a flying SSB, there is PABT test, which consist of two part: Instrument Battery Test and Simulator Test. 

For Instrument Battery Test, there was a long lecture of about two hours, in which an officer, explained us methods to read instruments of aircraft, and by using that data, finding direction of aircraft. Then there were two papers in it.. First paper consist of 15 questions, and time given to us was 7 minutes. I did 13 and most of them were wrong. 2nd paper consist of 60 questions, and time alloted to us was 30 minutes, I knew that this is do or die situation, and I need to give my best, I did 48 questions, in alloted time.

After lunch they announced result of Instrument Battery Test, and those who failed in it, were guided back to home. I cleared that exam, and I was happy.

Next exam was simulator test, in which a simulator consist of a computer screen and set of paddles and gears forming a setup was shown to us. On this simulator we had to play two games. They showed how to play games on it, and told us about marks system. When I got my chance to perform on simulator, it was 1630hrs in evening, I was tired, and I was not able to focus. After giving test on simulator, I realized that I am not going to clear it. In night they announced final result of test, and I was rejected. My chest number was 104. I felt sad, but I knew already that I did not perform up-to mark. Now I can't be pilot, as PABT test is once in life time. Now, my dreams were shattered. But I was not disappointed much. 

The woods are lovely dark and deep, But I have promises to keep. And miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep.